A shared laugh
Bowling
A relaxed game could give a young person and mentor a reason to enjoy the moment together. Conversation can come when it feels right, not on demand.
External Mentoring
Sometimes connection begins somewhere else.
School is the right place for some support. For other young people, it may feel easier to meet a steady, trusted adult in an agreed community space, away from the classroom and closer to everyday life.
Bowling. A coffee. A meal. A reason to talk, or simply to share the moment.
A different setting
Not every important conversation starts in school.
External Mentoring is a proposed community-based approach for young people who may feel more at ease outside the school setting.
It can be easier to talk while doing something side by side than while sitting across a desk. A shared activity could ease the pressure: room to laugh, listen and get to know each other, with the young person choosing what to share and when.
The activity is not the point. A young person should never have to reveal something personal to earn a mentor’s time or attention. The heart of this idea is a steady, respectful relationship with an appropriate adult who listens, remembers what matters and keeps showing up.
External Mentoring would be an additional way of delivering support, not a fifth pillar. It could sit alongside Hope, Help, Healing or Together if a young person’s needs and agreed plan made that appropriate.
Shared experiences
Time together can take many forms.
If a suitable plan is developed, the young person and mentor could choose an appropriate activity together. Bowling, coffee, a meal or something fun are examples, not a promise of provision.
A quieter moment
Coffee or a drink
A calm stop at an agreed, suitable community venue could feel easier than sitting down for a serious conversation. Sometimes a little less formality helps.
Time together
A meal
Sharing a meal could make room for an ordinary, welcoming moment. The venue, permission and cost would all need to be agreed in advance.
Following an interest
Fun activities
An activity that reflects a young person’s interests could give the pair something to enjoy together, without putting pressure on them to talk.
How it could work
Trust begins before the first meeting.
A thoughtful start means listening, agreeing the details and making sure the right people are involved. If developed, a possible pathway could look like this:
- 01
Start by listening
Hear from the young person. Where appropriate, speak with their parent or carer and referring organisation too. Explore what support they want and whether meeting in the community might feel right for them.
- 02
Agree a clear plan
Before anything begins, agree suitability, goals, boundaries and consent. Decide on the venue, timing, safe travel, communication and who is responsible for each part.
- 03
Meet in an agreed setting
Only if all required arrangements are in place would the mentor and young person meet, at an approved, suitable community venue. Never at an unplanned or private location.
- 04
Talk, do something, or both
Bowling, a coffee, a meal or another agreed activity could give them a shared focus. The young person sets the pace of conversation. There is no pressure to disclose.
- 05
Check in and review
Check whether the arrangement feels safe and useful. Through agreed channels, discuss how it is going and any next steps with the young person and appropriate adults.
Safety comes first
Outside school does not mean outside safeguarding.
Meeting in the community calls for clear responsibilities. The right foundations must be established before any external activity could take place.
Agree before meeting
- Young-person and parent/carer consent, and agreement with the referring organisation where applicable
- Mentor suitability, role-specific checks, training, boundaries and supervision
- Appropriate public or community venues and a proportionate risk assessment
- Safe arrival, collection and travel arrangements
Keep clear throughout
- Named responsibility and safeguarding escalation arrangements
- Agreed communication, attendance and record-keeping
- Activity costs and expenses agreed in advance, with no assumptions about who pays
- Privacy limits and a clear route for raising concerns
Hope. Help. Healing. Together.
The setting may change. The care still matters.
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